As the days progressed, I realise that even though mum has dementia, I still have to respect her sentiments, feelings and emotions as they are pretty much still there.
Sometimes mum expressed that some of her next-of-kin are no longer keen to visit her as she ‘doesn’t have much money’ now. It seems she’s still aware of the varying love and degree of caregiving and her expression of appreciation as every individual caregiver seems to vary too (not that she’s bias).
It is understandable that every caregiver’s time and degree of commitment varies as each individual do have their own concerns and priorities.
After all, true love is not based on meritocracy.
The most challenging for us, as caregivers, would be having to make a decision for mum when we are caught in between sentiments and her well-being.
At this point in time, we’re weighing the pros and cons of bringing mum back to stay with us in our new home, when it’s ready, or let her stay put in the nursing home which seem more favourable in terms of her well-being. We have sought a second-opinion from people who had similar experience with their parents and the majority would advise us to continue letting her stay in the nursing home.
On one hand, we cannot deny mum’s sentiments in longing to be at her ‘own home’ but on the other hand it seems more beneficial to let her stay put in the nursing home as her well-being, especially health, is significantly good with the nurses’ ’round-the-clock’ care and monitoring.
At the end of the day, we have learned to take things, one step at a time, praying for God’s wisdom and guidance and not be hasty in our decisions as far as mum is concerned.